Hey everyone!
So far my break has been pretty good..especially the part where I catch up on sleep. I haven't been home since I left for college (I live only an hour away) so it was pretty interesting getting back home and seeing my family for more than an hour. I didn't recognize just HOW much I missed chinese food and it was especially good since my mom was making it instead of the dining hall. There was quite a bit of skyping between me and Michael and different people from Catalyst even though we're only gone four days; all I know is that I ended up sleeping at four in the morning and trying to do quiet time (complete fail) before falling asleep. Thursday was uneventful; I tried to study but wasn't too productive about it though I was really hyped up about Friday. Friday I woke up at 4 in the morning to go black Friday shopping. Jon Chao and I drove back to Ann Arbor (sooooo eerie with no one around) to pick up Josh and Tina and then we head up to Birch Run (which is an outlet mall) to participate in the American activity called consumerism :D. Anyway, had a great time there just hanging out with them (also thanks to my dad for driving us there!) and having them be somewhere besides Ann Arbor. Plus the shopping was lots of fun and got a nice set of speakers :). Today going back to youth group for the first time was also strange, spent a lottt of time catching up with friends but there were also so many younger kids that I no longer knew. I also got to know some of the AIV kids who came to Troy to visit as well. Also, being able to drive was one of the best things that happened.
For missions week. I went to the 1040 screening, albeit very late. I was finishing up a program that took a grand total or 15 hours and when I got there I definitely was not in the mood for God. I remember getting there and just sitting down and passing out for 15 minutes (basically missed the entire movie except for the ending..which I wasn't paying attention to at all). Being there wasn't so much of a conviction for me to go out to reach the nations but more of a conviction to work on my relationship with God more. For a lot of it my heart just wasn't there and the only thing I could think about was how much I wanted to just go back home and sleep. On top of that, I was pretty cynical with everything Jaeson Ma said and it basically got to the point where I just went "forget it, this is kinda dumb because it's so unrealistic." Through this, I think God showed me how caught up I was with my own ideas and beliefs. I felt so frustrated with the inability to communicate with God that I eventually I gave up and asked God to just thaw my heart as impossible as it seemed. You know what? He did. At first it was hard but as time passed, I realized that in order for me to come closer to God, I had to sacrifice my own beliefs in realism and to not always question every detail. There's still a long way to go for me to sacrifice everything and putting it all in God's hands but Friday was a start for me to recognize the obstacles that sometimes stand in my way. Now none of these convictions really had anything to do with missions but I'm positive it's God training me with the basics.
-LOLspiffy (Dan)
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